So Grateful…

Although today is a sullen and cold day, I choose to be grateful. I am grateful that I started this blog that helps get some of my feelings out that I normally do not express. I am even more grateful to have found so many others with Lupus who blog about their experiences, good and bad. They are inspiring, real, make me feel less “crazy” because I am not the only one that feels exhausted, depressed, tired of all of this, happy when there is the smallest amount of extra energy and I can get out of bed, happy when my pain is at a “tolerable” level, and all of the other stuff that Lupus likes to spring on all of us. I guess I felt like I was “crazy” because everyone around me treats me like that because they don’t understand the disease or the medications and what it can do to someone on a physical and emotional level. They have questioned me about it and have even gone so far as to imply or told me that it’s all in my head, that I did this to myself, that I need to just “suck it up” and go to work so that I don’t get fired, that I have a low pain tolerance if I’m always in pain, that I’m lazy because I’m “tired all the time.” I thank everyone who so openly shares their lives via blogs. It makes me feel “normal” in the not so normal world of Lupus. It’s nice to know that there are others out there who understand. I wish that Lupus did not exist or that there was a cure and I fervently hope for a cure, one day wanting to help facilitate this once I’m in a “healthier” state. I don’t know what I can do but I will find out and do what I can. I hope that no one took this post wrong. I know that sometimes I use the wrong words. I hope for the best for each and every one of you. That a cure can be found and we can once again bask in the glorious light of the sun.



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